Befriend a stock market reporter

Tomorrow's Business

It’s good when market reporters are made to suffer. Since the rest of the time they have the easiest job in the office.

Shares in Rolls Royce today soared by 0.5p.

Oh, spare us.

Today’s the day. While the rest of us are pulling a Mike Ashley – power drinking our way through the election coverage tonight, the bullied office juniors (tongue-tied shrinking violets) will be at City trading houses in search of “colour”.

The City traders will be pulling all-nighters too, but then we pay City traders much more than stock market reporters in a clear reflection of their actual worth.

Market reporters can be useful of course – making the tea, collecting your dry cleaning.

And tonight is their chance to shine. What editors want is a frenzy. Chaos. Traders standing on desks, shirts ripped, screaming into phones. Fortunes being made and lost before our very eyes.

This never happens. What happens is that the pound rises 0.0003% against the dollar, which at least leaves the market reporters in their comfort zone.

If you do have colour from the City relating to the general election – anecdotes, curiosities, funny things that happened while the results were coming in – you could make yourself a few friends.

These folk need all the friends they can get.

Contact the Tomorrow's Business team news@tomorrowsbusiness.co