Good Luck, England

“England are in the World Cup Final for the first time since 1966,” said Gabby Logan, as the Lionesses triumphed over Australia in a 3-1 victory in the semi-finals. “Shall I say it again?” And she did. No matter that the final will be held on Sunday at 11am: fans will still be watching, hoping for a victory over Spain. Who needs a pint in the pub anyway? 

And who needs an impact-absorbing sports sock? According to one manufacturer, the England team do, and you too can “unleash your inner Lioness” (geddit?) if you buy a pair. The Lionesses are this week’s Barbie movie, and no product is too spurious or unrelated to be attached to their success. 

Obviously, there’s beer: the game’s early start hasn’t precluded Greene King from enticing people to buy its Session Beer Box. Gambling websites are having a field day, too, advertising their odds. And let’s not forget bras, for how can you win a World Cup without a supportive one like the Shock Absorber? And then there are more offbeat offerings, such as Manchester Zoo naming its new cownose ray (yup, I had to google it too) after Chloe Kelly.

But it’s not all mad / bad / sad. Powerleague will be offering 100 hours of free football pitches at 41 venues across the UK to grassroots girls’ youth clubs, a synergy that’s altruistic while also making sense. Good luck, England. May you win – and may you also triumph in your brand endorsements, just as your male counterparts have done for years.